A Beautiful Light
Isabella Maria Shinn was a beautiful light to this world. She shined so bright in every room she walked into. She changed and impacted so many people’s lives in so many ways, and I would like to share mine.
Freshman year of high school is when I first met Izzy. We had last period Spanish class together and all I can remember is getting absolutely nothing done. We were always cracking up about something going on in one of our lives. It was something I always looked forward to at the end of each day. In sophomore year, we started to become closer and we hung out so much. We started to become the best of friends and we never left each other's side. I would’ve done anything for Izzy, just like she would’ve done anything for me. We talked about our kids being the best of friends when we grew up and coming over for holidays. It was something we dreamt of, and sadly, it will still only be a dream. During junior year of high school we were absolutely inseparable. I’ve had a lot of different best friends in my life, but Iz will always be my favorite. She will forever hold a special place in my heart. Iz and I had a falling out during the middle of Junior year. I still will never forgive myself for that and I will always regret that decision I made. At that time it was what was best for me and I know Iz understands now, but I will always regret it. I wanted my best friend back and I knew one day it would happen. Senior year came very quickly and I had the most classes I ever had with her. We started becoming close again and I know we would’ve gotten it all back if it weren’t for that tragic accident.
Ever since those miserable days in December, I keep asking myself the same questions. Why her? What did she do to deserve this? Why did this have to happen? Why? Why? Why?
The true answers to these questions are that we may never know. God brought her home too early. He brought her home before I could make up for all the time we lost as best friends.
I’m laying in my bed right now writing this essay on how she impacted my life and how she changed my perspective on life. Iz not only impacted my life, but she saved it as well. She was there when I needed her the most. She never left my side, ever. She’s still by my side now. She will never leave my side because that’s who Iz was and ALWAYS will be. I know I could’ve been a better best friend. I know I should’ve stayed, but as soon as we got close again, she was taken from me. This pain felt like us parting all over again, but the pain was different too. It was as if I was being pulled under water and being held there. I didn’t want to believe what I heard because I knew it couldn’t be true that this beautiful light in my life passed away. She was only 18. She had her whole life ahead of her; in fact, it was just starting. She had the biggest dreams and aspirations. She not only had these dreams and aspirations, but she also had a heart of gold too. A heart that I believe continues to beat, but this time inside of me.
The day she died, a part of me went with her and a part of her stayed with me. It will always be with me. I will live my life for her now. Everything I do is for her because when I didn’t want to live anymore, she told me to push. I pushed for her because she was the light in my life. She was my true best friend. The girl who brought out the best in me and who loved me no matter what. The girl who made me crack up until my stomach hurt. The girl who would make fun of me for how short I am. The girl who did everything for me and now I do everything for her. I will always call her my best friend because I know we were always best friends no matter what happened.
I’ve learned that you never know when it can be someone’s last time on earth. Say “I love you” often, hug people often, smile at everyone, don’t go to bed after a fight, don’t lose your best friend over boys, love endlessly, and be kinder than how you feel.
Iz, thank you for truly changing my life. I will spread your story to everyone. Everyone deserves to hear about you and the light that glowed when you appeared. You saved me. You changed me. You loved me. You were my best friend. Thank you isn’t even enough for me to say to you. I hope people around the world hear your story and share it. My goal is to keep your memory alive until the day that I die. I hope it continues to spread for years and years to come after that as well. You deserved the best life and sadly it was cut too short, my beautiful angel. We will meet again one day, so until then I will do everything in my power to keep you alive with me and live for YOU.